Dear me,
I'm sorry...
I'm sorry for putting others before you. Trying to fix everyone Elses problems knowing well I have so much to heal and fix in ME. I'm sorry I don't give you enough time to process and heal from hurts I cause myself or others caused me. I've neglected the wounds that my own blood has been seeping out from years of pain and hurt. I'm sorry that there were days smiling hurt, but you forced yourself to laugh so no one had to worry about you. I'm sorry you gave all your time and effort to people that never and would have never give you the same back. I'm sorry you cried yourself to sleep, and no one bothered to know why, and I'm sorry that i did not love you like you deserved to be loved and physically taken care of.
Love,
your future self
As today marks a new beginning for my journey in my health. I wanted to write a sorry letter to my younger self and finally taking full responsibility for my own hurts and damage that has caused me to be the broken person I was for the majority of my life. Although there were other people involved and circumstance's that lead ME TO CHOSE TO TRUST AND DO EVERYTHING, I DID FOR THE YEARS I DID.
I challenged my girlfriend to get as fit as possible for the month of June. Yes, there was a bet and repercussions to the Loosers. I figured it had to be something awful, so we definitely try our best to do so to help us push harder.
I'm moving forward in my life the chapter is done but so is that book and another is about to start right above the horizon. Things are looking up for me as bad as things can get and frustrating, I'm keeping my hope and positive thinking above all out. I also am allowing my emotions to be express and release when needed in a healthy way. there was a time when I use to say I wouldn't make it past 18 and maybe in a different world I would of not and for that I'm so grateful I no longer live in the lifestyle and partake in the action that would lead me to my early death bed.
I want to LIVE and see my future kids have kids and have a full life filled with hope, dreaming's come to pass, visions unfolding before me, and enjoy it with the one I love so much and make her my wife and mother of my kids. Build a place called home that will be our refuge in bad times, and we rough it out until better days come. As well as get my health in a better place to prove I can because I at least owe that to myself today for all the suffering I had to endure due to others and MY OWN faults.
It's time we start taking actions for our hurts yes people will hurt you and you allowed them in your life and trust them so for that you are to blame. It's time to heal that younger self and move on, breath and live life to the fullest... love you 😁❤
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